So this little ball of black fur known as the demon kitteh has a new habit. She has to help with most things in the bathroom. Apparently I do not know how to properly brush my teeth, brush my hair, get dressed, etc. And being the dedicated kitteh she is, she insists on showing me how to do everything.
At first it was cute. The kitteh is standing on the toilet with her paws up for attention, and as long as I pet her she was happy. That was a couple of weeks ago. Now it is on the counter, leaning on me and guiding the toothbrush. Ok, she thinks she is guiding but that is not really what is happening. And god forbid I move from the sink, thats when the serious looks of disgust begin. How dare I move from her immediate reach. Don't I know, that as a silly human, I can't do anything by myself? She knows when I'm to stop, the toothbrush signals (gotta love electric ones). As soon as it signals, she is off the counter and waiting for me to get dressed.
Of course she has to help with that too. Does she not realize that I did all these things myself before she decided that I needed a babysitter to assist with them? She helps with make-up, curling irons and flat irons. However, she hates the hairdryer. That is just way too noisy for her. Is there a way to make it so that the curling iron makes that noise?
She also assists when I'm on the laptop, playing on my phone, trying to read. I obviously need assistance with everything. What she doesn't realize is the only assistance I need is her out of the way. Sitting on the keyboard looking cute will win her loves, but only so I can remove said kitteh from the keyboard.
How did I ever survive without the help of this very dedicated assistant? I survived quite well actually. Just don't tell her, she'll never believe you.
Friday, December 13, 2013
Thursday, December 12, 2013
Christmas shopping and other not so joys of the season
So every year I tell myself that I'm going to start early. Christmas shopping that is. Yeah right, never happens. The few times I've done this I hide them, only to find them way after Christmas, sometimes in time for next Christmas. So I started really hitting the shopping two days ago.
Now I really don't like the malls. Too many people and too many rude ones. I used to like the malls and then found amazon. But luckily my days off are in the middle of the week so it isn't too bad. But just barely, and I have to finish next week.
Also the kids are at the stage where they are getting kinda hard to shop for. Mainly because I get the wish lists really late. Kids, I'd like the lists in, oh say, August. That'll give me time to shop, hide, lose and reshop for your gifts. But a mom can dream.
Stocking stuffers for them are the hardest. When they were little, crayons, small toys and silly string worked. Now its, OMG what am I going to get. What candy do they still like? What are the ingredients, as the girls have developed food issues. Ugh. Ok two are of legal age, maybe airplane size booze bottles would work. But which ones? This is going to be as bad as finding candy they will eat.
I have a wonderful boyfriend this year that I get to shop for. But what to get the guy who has whatever he needs and the wishlist contains things that I can't afford and have not a clue where to find some of the items on the list. He doesn't eat a lot of sweets, so candy is out (I'd end up eating a lot of it). Buying clothes for men is out, too hard to do, they can shop for themselves. Just kidding, if you gave me sizes and whatnot, I'd love to shop for you. You like pink and purple, right?
Wrapping is a whole other subject. I've been lucky and Shortie has been my elf in charge of this. I used to really enjoy it, but midnight wrapping sessions fighting with cats has somehow stopped that. This year maybe I can keep them away long enough to do that. How much would Shortie charge me to tackle this project for me? I'll have to see if she is available for hire again. She's almost 20 so slave labor is probably not an option and its going to cost me. Or maybe I'll just get a bottle of wine and tackle it myself.
I did break down and get an elf on the shelf. Not for home, the kids aren't going to buy the Santa is watching you thing anymore. But I got it for work. Maybe if the customers drink enough, I can keep them in line with the Santa is watching line. The elf is having fun at work though. He was on a shelf behaving himself when I left one day last week, and when I came in the next day he was playing on the beer taps. We could have a very drunk elf if we don't keep an eye on him. So Mr. Elf, no drinking and climbing the Christmas trees in the restaurant anymore. That would be a sad day if someone found him dangling from the branches.
Now I really don't like the malls. Too many people and too many rude ones. I used to like the malls and then found amazon. But luckily my days off are in the middle of the week so it isn't too bad. But just barely, and I have to finish next week.
Also the kids are at the stage where they are getting kinda hard to shop for. Mainly because I get the wish lists really late. Kids, I'd like the lists in, oh say, August. That'll give me time to shop, hide, lose and reshop for your gifts. But a mom can dream.
Stocking stuffers for them are the hardest. When they were little, crayons, small toys and silly string worked. Now its, OMG what am I going to get. What candy do they still like? What are the ingredients, as the girls have developed food issues. Ugh. Ok two are of legal age, maybe airplane size booze bottles would work. But which ones? This is going to be as bad as finding candy they will eat.
I have a wonderful boyfriend this year that I get to shop for. But what to get the guy who has whatever he needs and the wishlist contains things that I can't afford and have not a clue where to find some of the items on the list. He doesn't eat a lot of sweets, so candy is out (I'd end up eating a lot of it). Buying clothes for men is out, too hard to do, they can shop for themselves. Just kidding, if you gave me sizes and whatnot, I'd love to shop for you. You like pink and purple, right?
Wrapping is a whole other subject. I've been lucky and Shortie has been my elf in charge of this. I used to really enjoy it, but midnight wrapping sessions fighting with cats has somehow stopped that. This year maybe I can keep them away long enough to do that. How much would Shortie charge me to tackle this project for me? I'll have to see if she is available for hire again. She's almost 20 so slave labor is probably not an option and its going to cost me. Or maybe I'll just get a bottle of wine and tackle it myself.
I did break down and get an elf on the shelf. Not for home, the kids aren't going to buy the Santa is watching you thing anymore. But I got it for work. Maybe if the customers drink enough, I can keep them in line with the Santa is watching line. The elf is having fun at work though. He was on a shelf behaving himself when I left one day last week, and when I came in the next day he was playing on the beer taps. We could have a very drunk elf if we don't keep an eye on him. So Mr. Elf, no drinking and climbing the Christmas trees in the restaurant anymore. That would be a sad day if someone found him dangling from the branches.
Friday, May 31, 2013
It's been awhile
So it's been an interesting year so far. New kitten, new boyfriend, Shortie has a license and a car, The Boy has a permit.
So last 4th of July, not only was dipshit kitteh freaked out due to the fireworks. Shortie texted to say that the reservation where they were doing fireworks at got closed due to idiots, she came home with a surprise. So she walked in the door with her hoodie backwards. While holding the hood she told me "look what I brought home". My first thought was "oh god the bomb squad will be showing up next". Instead she pulled out a little black ball of fur. Little did I know that it was a demon spawn from hell. Ok, not that bad, but boy what a little shit. Shortie named her Independence aka Indie, I just called her demon kitteh.
Did some overnight shifts with K from work due to staffing shortage. Made for long days, but the overtime was worth it. In fact, doing one tonight to people calling in with family emergencies. Which worked as the transmission went out in my car in September. I hate cars sometimes. But at least Shortie had just gotten her car and was able to borrow another one so I could use hers to get to work. Its a land yacht, 1981 Pontiac Bonneville, awesome car with lots of crunch room.
Spent the Christmas holiday home sick, but got really good leftovers sent home in a care package. Mom didn't do a turkey this year, she did tri-tip roast, which if you haven't tried it you must. That was a really nice change, hopefully she'll do it again this year.
Norwescon was a blast. My friend T introduced my to cake vodka. Want to talk about a dangerous alcohol, it doesn't even taste like booze, definately could get into trouble with that. Finally had a new costume this year, after thinking I killed my mom's sewing machine. That was a scary moment in time. I also thought I had killed my brother's dog the same day.
Also have a really awesome new boyfriend, who hasn't run away screaming in fear yet. Maybe the duct tape and restraints are working, for now.
Time to go back to work, sort of.
So last 4th of July, not only was dipshit kitteh freaked out due to the fireworks. Shortie texted to say that the reservation where they were doing fireworks at got closed due to idiots, she came home with a surprise. So she walked in the door with her hoodie backwards. While holding the hood she told me "look what I brought home". My first thought was "oh god the bomb squad will be showing up next". Instead she pulled out a little black ball of fur. Little did I know that it was a demon spawn from hell. Ok, not that bad, but boy what a little shit. Shortie named her Independence aka Indie, I just called her demon kitteh.
Did some overnight shifts with K from work due to staffing shortage. Made for long days, but the overtime was worth it. In fact, doing one tonight to people calling in with family emergencies. Which worked as the transmission went out in my car in September. I hate cars sometimes. But at least Shortie had just gotten her car and was able to borrow another one so I could use hers to get to work. Its a land yacht, 1981 Pontiac Bonneville, awesome car with lots of crunch room.
Spent the Christmas holiday home sick, but got really good leftovers sent home in a care package. Mom didn't do a turkey this year, she did tri-tip roast, which if you haven't tried it you must. That was a really nice change, hopefully she'll do it again this year.
Norwescon was a blast. My friend T introduced my to cake vodka. Want to talk about a dangerous alcohol, it doesn't even taste like booze, definately could get into trouble with that. Finally had a new costume this year, after thinking I killed my mom's sewing machine. That was a scary moment in time. I also thought I had killed my brother's dog the same day.
Also have a really awesome new boyfriend, who hasn't run away screaming in fear yet. Maybe the duct tape and restraints are working, for now.
Time to go back to work, sort of.
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